Reveal, Revive

I feel terrible. Inside and out. When I get this way, I want to hide away from everything and everyone. This includes forces I can't get away from, nor should I resist. By forces I guess I mean help. I don't really want help from people though. I don't want to listen to their advice. It's not what I want. The answers aren't the right answers. I already thought of those answers. I just sort of want to start fading away into the background. Anyway I made this

So like everything I make, it's a mess. So there's a bunch of red and gray mess under the white if you happen to be color blind. The red and gray I guess are kinda the pain and troubles that are from some wound or hurt people encounter. People try to mask it and cover it up, which is the white that looks like it would be used for a wall or something. You can't actually cover it and draw yourself up as something you're not because it will show somehow. The dark blue streaks on the face are because I personally feel my indicator for portraying my state of mind is through my face. When someone else reveals their love towards your revealed wounds, that's where revival comes in. They start mending the cuts.
I don't know if I want to be mended though. I feel like I'd be bothering people. I don't want to waste their time or mine. That's why the person or whatever that is in the picture isn't drawn out. It's more like a soul or spirit. I don't really know. I'm not having such a great time. Plus my immune system seems to be effected by this too. Bleh.